Teething is finally over along with lots of crying and probably some fevers. Yay! There is a downside, however: with all those pearly whites your baby has acquired some powerful tools. While chewing food and toys is fine, what do you do when his favorite thing to chomp on is his brother, his playmates, or you? Biting is a perfectly normal child behavior, but it is obviously not acceptable. To teach your little one to save it for his “O’s” check out the following tips.
There are two ways that every parent must handle biting. First, they need to understand on a “‘big picture” level what the behavior means. A child who is biting out of frustration requires a different approach than a child who is biting out of curiosity. Once they’ve identified when and why a child is biting, they can address the specific cause by teaching alternatives (like saying “stop” or “no”), limiting group play before nap, etc. For more information about dealing with some different causes of biting check out this tip sheet by The Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning.
The second way that parents have to deal with biting is the “in the moment” response. When your child has bitten someone, the experts at Zero to Three recommend the following steps:
1. Stay calm. By thinking before you act you are modeling self control for your child and are less likely to regret something you say or do.
2. Move the child away from the one who was bitten and say firmly, “Stop. No biting. Biting hurts.” This message must be short and clear so that young children with limited language and older children who are frustrated, angry, etc. can grasp it easily.
3. Pay more attention to the child who was bitten. This models empathy and makes it less likely that the child will bite to get attention. Parenting 101: Negative attention is still attention.
4. When both children are calm and ready to play again, show the child who bit some strategies he or she can use in the future. You can also discuss (with older children) why they bit and how much it can hurt other people’s feelings and bodies. Make sure this is separated from the biting incident so that they are not getting attention at the time.
For more tips on handling biting visit Zero to Three here. If your child’s biting seems too frequent and/or does not decrease over time, consult a child behavior specialist. They can analyze your child’s behavior and help develop solutions specific for your family.
